Birth & Death

It was the greatest honor of my life, roaring my son out of my body on my last possible breath, like a dying grizzly bear on the cheap carpet of our shitty rental.

It’s the moment I was born, too.

Everything I’d ever done, everyone I ever lost, every heartbreak, every failure, every letdown, every bender, every blackout, every tear cried, every tragedy, every grudge and resentment dissolved in one cataclysmic moment because I was no longer the girl I had been.

I was starting over in womanhood. I was becoming a mother.

I must admit, I am really going to miss her…

That wounded girl, who in her own way was so very brave.

I look back on her with forgiveness and grace now, but I hated her while I was her.