Birth Choices & Backbone

This one’s different from my last few newsletters. It’s not a story from my past, it’s something that’s been burning a hole in me the last few months.

The first two times I tried to sit down and write this, I was so angry and resentful I terrified myself upon rereading them. Learning to settle into forgiveness and understanding is not my strong suit. Say something fucked up and I probably won’t let it go… Oops! Looks like you’ve been added to my naughty list. Three strikes and you’re out. Maybe my mommy issues are showing.

I’ve struggled for the entirety of this pregnancy with the constant onslaught of unwarranted comments about my choices: especially from other mothers who, ironically, don’t seem to really enjoy motherhood all that much to begin with. I find those women to be the loudest. Then there’s family, insisting I be so careful about my desire to homebirth because of some birth defect that happened two generations ago (eye roll).